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If you are noticing that your child is struggling

If you are noticing that your child is struggling with their body right now, you’re not alone. Our kids are hurting in so many ways, and many of them are displacing their fear, anger, and frustration onto their bodies.

This list covers some of the most common symptoms of negative body image. Many of these symptoms may increase during coronavirus quarantine.

Often we don’t even notice negative body image in our kids because it’s so common. But negative body image can derail our vibrant and passionate kids from the life they should be living. Help your child stay healthy by monitoring and supporting their body image. We have lots of ideas at www.more-love.org💕

These statistics tell a story. Eating disorders ar

These statistics tell a story. Eating disorders are about more than weight, but a desire for low weight is often the impetus. Striving to be thin starts young, and it’s a hard habit to break in our diet culture. Eating disorders are also much more than anorexia. When statistics are based on anorexia it means we have a massive undercount of the true prevalence and impact of eating disorders. Parents can help kids avoid and heal from eating disorders, but to do this we must overcome our own weight biases and kick diet culture to the curb.💕

In the past few weeks we’ve seen two major weigh

In the past few weeks we’ve seen two major weight debates. One for a pop star, and one for a president.

Let’s collaborate so we can create a world in which our kids don’t hate their bodies and restrict food in an attempt to feel better.

Public discussions about other people’s weight - including famous people’s weight - is unhelpful. In fact, it provides a massive platform for fatphobia and weight shaming. This is not health-promoting. It is harmful.

Let’s teach our kids that nobody’s weight is up for debate💕

The fact is that our society is both fatphobic and

The fact is that our society is both fatphobic and foodphobic.

Combined, these phobias support eating disorders.

Change is hopefully coming, but it’s hard.

Meanwhile, those of us who are raising kids have an opportunity to make incremental change by changing our own beliefs and influencing our kids’ beliefs about food and bodies.

We don’t have to be afraid of food and fat. We can live in peace and harmony with our bodies.

Let’s be the change!💕

Parents really, really want to raise healthy kids.

Parents really, really want to raise healthy kids. Unfortunately, we’re told that the biggest obstacle facing our kids’ health is their body weight. But this approach is harming, not helping our kids grow up healthy.

Parents who are worried about their kids’ weight are more likely to have kids who diet, and the No. 1 outcome of dieting is weight cycling, which has serious consequences.

Parents who want to raise healthier kids should ignore diet culture and instead focus on developing a healthy body image and an intuitive relationship with food.

We spoke with Judith Matz, LCSW, co-author of Diet Survivor’s Handbook. She provided us with great ideas about how parents can get off the diet cycle and raise healthier kids.

Please check it out if you’re interested at More-Love.org💕

Loving kids may seem complicated, but if we tune i

Loving kids may seem complicated, but if we tune into them. If we listen and adjust. If we apologize and try again. If we keep showing up. If when the way we show up isn’t working, we try something different. This is how we love.

There is no perfection in parenting. There is only practice.

If you’re making mistakes. If your child isn’t talking to you. If you aren’t talking to your child. You’re not alone. Your child still needs you. Love can still win.

Don’t lose faith in love.

Love is a dance. We keep moving, and it’s best when we’re fluid, flexible, and responsive💕

Maybe you made an inappropriate comment about your

Maybe you made an inappropriate comment about your kid’s body.

Maybe you insisted that your child eat all their veggies before getting dessert.

Maybe you put your whole family on a sugar-free diet.

You’re not alone. It’s OK. Yes, we want our kids to accept their bodies and eat intuitively and find peace with their bodies and with food. But we’re going to make mistakes.

And one imperfect comment, one moment, one day, month, or year does not make us a bad parent.

We are imperfect by design. And we don’t need to be perfect at anything to raise healthy kids. Let’s just keep learning and trying and apologizing when we make mistakes, OK?💕
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P.S. I don’t know the origin of this quote - I’ve seen it in numerous places. But if you know to whom I should attribute it, please let me know!

I’ve seen a lot of posts this morning thanking m

I’ve seen a lot of posts this morning thanking moms for being selfless, and I call BS. Being selfless is not the path to good parenting. We must maintain our selves and reflect upon our selves constantly to be good parents. We can love kids fully and completely while maintaining our selves. In fact, I suggest that the only way to love someone fully and completely is to maintain your self in the relationship. So please, don’t be selfless today or any day. Our selves are important in the parenting journey!❤️❤️
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Posted @withregram • @teedoodler Happy 🌎🌏🌍 Earth day!! This is one of my favorite doodles because it’s from one of my favorite books, The Giving Tree. However, when I reread the book it makes me question how the tree gave everything she had. What if she set boundaries?? What if she shared what she had without letting herself be cut down? I’m sharing with the added note that this is Shel Silverstein’s work reimagined by me because I want to give him credit, while also acknowledging that I adjusted the wording. My doodle is pretty close to what he did and I’m proud of it 🤗

Those of us who promote a non-diet approach are of

The vast majority of people in our culture want to

The vast majority of people in our culture want to be thin.

And that includes most children. By the age of 5, our kids already think that it’s better to be thin than fat.

Our kids live in a fatphobic culture, and even body-positive, anti-diet, HAES-aligned parents will see symptoms of fatphobia in their kids.

It doesn’t mean we have failed as parents. It simply means we live in this culture.

And, just like adults, the best thing that our kids can learn is to have a “second thought.” It’s normal if the first thought (which is culturally programmed) is “I wish I were thinner.” And the important thing is to have a second thought that aligns with body acceptance.

Something like: “I think that because society tells me that thin = better. But this is my body, and I accept it at any size.”
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Our kids’ bad body thoughts don’t mean we have failed them. It just means they (like us) live in diet culture💕

All we can do is walk with our people through the

All we can do is walk with our people through the mess.

We usually can’t stop the mess from happening.

We can rarely control the mess.

And it’s best if we don’t pretend the mess isn’t happening.

Instead, let’s walk beside our loved ones, with trust and hope, through the mess. That’s a lot. That’s enough.💕

So much of eating disorder recovery focuses on foo

So much of eating disorder recovery focuses on food and body issues. And of course they are hugely important.

But we must remember that eating disorders are mental disorders. The food and body issues arise in response to mental health conditions and emotional needs.

Food and body issues are the symptoms of the mental disorder. When we meet the emotional needs that drive them, we are more likely to find full recovery💕

The fear of fat is so intense and so overwhelming

The fear of fat is so intense and so overwhelming that we have preschoolers who are terrified of it.

Our culture has gone so far down the path of fatphobia that we can’t even imagine it’s possible to see bodies without the lens of fat being a sign of character failure.

This is hurting us. It’s hurting our health and hurting our relationships and hurting our children.

It’s driving healthcare providers, teachers, and parents to prescribe eating disorder behavior as if it’s OK.
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It is not OK.💔

It can seem like eating disorders are mysterious a

It can seem like eating disorders are mysterious and silent. And it’s true that they often sneak in under the cover of societally-sanctioned behaviors.

But they are not silent. They have a lot to say about how we feel about ourselves, society, our families, trauma, friendships, and more.

Eating disorders are a communication tool - we just have to know how to listen.💕

There is no need to know our weight. There is no b

There is no need to know our weight. There is no benefit in stepping on the scale.

And the side effects of weighing ourselves include increased stress, weight cycling, and eating disorders.

No thank you.

Unless we have a medical reason for having a bathroom scale (and no, “avoiding weight gain” is not a medical reason), let’s ditch the scale.

Live free!💕

This seems like an important thing to remember rig

This seems like an important thing to remember right now with all the unscientific BS about weight and weight loss. Remember that correlation is not causation. Check out the article by @chr1styharrison 💕

Just because someone says they love you and want w

Just because someone says they love you and want what’s best for you doesn’t mean they know how to give you the love you need.

In recovery, sometimes we learn that the love we have received isn’t actually the love we need. And so we have to learn to assert our needs and ask the people who love us to give us the love we need to thrive.

This is why recovery is best when it’s a family affair filled with humility and curiosity. Families who send a loved one away to get “fixed” and never look in the mirror are not actually being loving. They often perpetuate the same conditions that caused our eating disorders and addictions, making recovery feel impossible.

Families that assess themselves and adjust their behavior and love-giving to accommodate someone who is in recovery are like unicorns. Rare, beautiful and magical, they can make all the difference. 🦄💕

Our bodies don’t define our mental health. Our t

Our bodies don’t define our mental health. Our thoughts, beliefs, fears, and behaviors do. Let’s always remember that eating disorders are mental disorders, not weight disorders.

Non-weight-based symptoms of an eating disorder may include:
- food rules and restrictions
- discomfort and anxiety around food
- sneaking food and binge eating
- making excuses not to eat (especially with others)
- increased anxiety and/or depression
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❤️❤️If you or someone you love is showing signs of an eating disorder, please reach out for support. We have a list of professionals who can help @ More-Love.org❤️❤️

If you're struggling with all the snacking at home

If you're struggling with all the snacking at home, try to establish some (lenient and flexible) boundaries around snacks. Here are some ideas:

1. Set up a snack basket on the counter and in the fridge so that your kids can pick a snack without asking you for help. stock a mixture of fruits, vegetables, proteins, and fats, and don’t be afraid to offer fun and convenient foods.

2. Recognize that eating every 2-4 hours is absolutely normal and healthy. If someone is reaching for food more frequently, it may just be a sign that they aren’t eating enough at each sitting.

3. Trust your kids' bodies to guide their appetite. If you have previously controlled their food intake, they may overcorrect for a while, but then they will settle into a healthy eating pattern for their body.

4. If you feel that snacking is completely out of control, see what happens if you structure 5-8 meal/snack times per day. Make these intentional moments when everyone in your family checks in on their hunger and food is offered. See what happens, and decide whether an eating structure like this can help your family.

5. Don't stress too much about food. It's true that you need to watch out for major weight fluctuations and eating changes (significantly more/less than usual), which may indicate depression, anxiety, or an eating disorder. But most kids/people will eat a little more and move a little less during this time period, and that's OK. This period of our lives is not "normal," so it's understandable if we have some changes in response.

Most of all, know that this is a challenging time for all of us. Give yourself so much compassion ... we’re all doing the best we can!💕

Sometimes parents worry that they need to monitor

Sometimes parents worry that they need to monitor their kids’ weight or what’s on their plate.

Of course we should pay attention to major changes in eating and weight that may be symptoms of depression, anxiety, and/or an eating disorder.

But let’s be very cautious that our concern isn’t being driven by diet culture, which tells us that our kids need to be as small as possible, and that we are responsible for “watching” their weight.

The greatest risk to health (now and always) is not weight, but mental health.

Let’s keep our eyes peeled for signs of mental health, not focused on scales and plates❤️❤️

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